Sunday, August 17, 2008

Cube-ism, and Where I Went Wrong

The Jeu de Marienbad, or Nim, or Fantan, or Tiuktiuk, or Tiouk-tiouk, is like a short, crappy game of chess. I can't play chess, since I can't accomplish drivings, or pool, or finding a parking lot, or walking to a destination, or anything even obliquely involving geometry. But I like to think I'm smart enough to accomplish many short, crappy versions of many things.

So, my question to you is, why can't I win it? You can answer that here. (Hint: I can do simple [okay, very simple: chuckle smugly, think of me as 'cute,' and then calm yourself] arithmetic, so I count ahead and do what limited planning my mind is able to do, and it seems to me my mind is indeed able enough for this, if at the same time admittedly not for chess, so factor that in to your factoring.)

I think whoever goes first loses?

Or is there something I do wrong? Or is it just that, with a human partner and thus the opportunity for tactical application of my formidable Withering Glance, and vast knowledge of human and canid psychology, I might be able endlessly to vanquish non-virtual opponents in this realm?

(Or tomorrow at the tattooist's should I just get it engraved in the stone of my biceps that '2 + 2 = Something the Vague Idea of Which I at Times Begin to Comprehend Theoretically and then Lose Entirely the Gist thereof'?)

(Or perhaps just 'Ibn Sina, I'm sorry.')

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